The Soviettes

Avoid being a douche. The Soviettes are not a three-piece girl band. They are a four piece. One of the members has a wang doodle, drums, and sings. His name is Danny. The Soviettes are based out of Minneapolis, Minnesota, home to The Replacements, Husker Du, Assrash, and more.

The Soviettes were formed in the winter of 2000. They have three full lengths (LP I, LP II, LP III), a split with the Valentines, a track on the No Hold Back’ All Attack!!! Minneapolis band comp, and a couple of bitchin’ 7’s. As stated before, there are four members of the band. Here are their individual accomplishments.

Annie Guitarist / Vocals:
The Soviettes aren’t communists of any flavor. They’re more like partiers. The name came when the band was looking for a name and Annie was serving coffee. Instead of receiving a cash tip, a customer said, ’You’re band should be called the Soviettes.’ Ta da.
Annie won a limbo contest in Fargo, North Dakota. It was a big deal.
At thirteen, Annie purchased her first punk rock record. The Sex Pistols’ Never Mind the Bollocks was in a used bookstore, hidden among a box of Christian records.
Annie is also in International Robot and Awesome Snakes.

Sturgeon Guitarist / Vocals:
Sturgeon is meticulous (there are extensive pre-tour checklists) and safety conscious. (‘Everybody buckled up?’)
She is a math teacher. Her dad is a famous scientist.
Her favorite teacher of all time was also a math teacher: Ms. Bibblenix.
She was in a band called the Salteens and has recently been married to Billy, guitarist of Dillinger Four.

Suzy Bass / Vocals:
Suzy is super accident-prone. When she was growing up in Fargo, the staff at the emergency room knew her by name.
Her dog, Tucker, would curl up in the bass drum when the band was first practicing in her basement.
Suzy got married in Vegas. Suzy is now divorced.
She played in two Fargo punk bands in the early 1990s: Vroom! and Bombshell.

Danny Drums / Vocals:
Danny has a penis. Shhh!
Danny was the best free throw shooter at basketball camp. In front of four hundred kids, he sank nine out of ten. He readily admits he’s not that great at basketball.
Danny talks to his mom on the phone at least once a week.
Danny is also in the bands International Robot, Short Fuses, the Dummies, and Awesome Snakes.